Coatue
Selected reporting and mythical analysis on coatue.
Fintech
Nov 24, 2025Revolut's $75B Valuation: Because Who Needs Profits When You Have Investor FOMO?
Revolut's $75B valuation hits new heights of absurdity in fintech, with investors betting big on losses and buzzwords. Read our satirical take on this hilarious funding frenzy.
AI
Oct 22, 2025Sumble AI: Because Salespeople Need Even More Excuses to Avoid Actual Human Interaction
Sumble AI raises $38.5M to bring hilarious AI context to sales, making prospecting more robotic and absurd than ever. Read our satirical take on this tech frenzy.