Cybersecurity
Selected reporting and mythical analysis on cybersecurity.
Steam's Malware Surprise: FBI Discovers Games That Play You
Discover how malware hidden in Steam games is turning gamers into unwitting crypto miners in this satirical tech news piece. Learn tips to avoid digital pickpockets with a laugh.
Microsoft's Copilot AI Goes Rogue: Reads Your Emails Like a Nosy Office Gossip
Microsoft's Copilot AI accidentally read confidential emails in a hilarious privacy fail. Discover how your office assistant became a digital gossip and what it means for AI privacy.
European Parliament Declares War on AI: Lawmakers Forced to Actually Think for Themselves
The European Parliament bans AI tools, forcing lawmakers to think for themselves in a hilarious saga of security panic, analog rediscovery, and absurd alternatives.
Vega's $120M Series B: Because Detecting Cyber Threats Was Just Too Easy, Let's Rethink It Into Oblivion
Vega Security's $120M Series B funding aims to 'rethink' cyber threat detection with absurd innovations like AI poetry and emotional support firewalls – because why keep it simple?
NordVPN's Threat Protection Pro™: Because Who Needs a Dedicated Antivirus Anymore?
In a bold move to simplify your cybersecurity shopping list, NordVPN introduces Threat Protection Pro™—a feature that not only encrypts your data but also scans your downloads for malware, blocks m...
VCs Panic-Buy AI Security: Because Your Coffee Machine Might Be Plotting World Domination
VCs are funding AI security startups in a panic over 'rogue agents' and 'shadow AI.' But is the real threat just over-caffeinated algorithms?
depthfirst Secures $40 Million Series A - AI Security Firm's Algorithm Now Just Deeply Suspicious of Everything
AI security firm depthfirst raises $40 million by teaching AI to be suspicious of everything - including itself. Silicon Valley's latest solution: paranoid algorithms as a service.
Crypto Hackers Pocket $2.7B in 2025, Achieve 'Most Theft Ever' Hat-Trick in Digital Currency Heist Olympics
Crypto hackers break theft records again in 2025, stealing $2.7B in a hilarious display of digital incompetence and irony. Read our satirical take on the never-ending heist saga.
Coupang's 'Data Drop Party': 34 Million Korean Shoppers Now BFFs with Hackers, Thanks to E-Commerce Giant's Security Blunder
Coupang's hilarious data breach exposes 34M customers' secrets, from kimchi fridges to K-drama binges. Read our satirical take on this e-commerce security fail.
NordVPN: Because Who Doesn't Love Adding Extra Layers to Their Already Complicated Digital Lives?
In a world where your refrigerator might be spying on you, NordVPN heroically steps in to encrypt your every move. With over 7,000 servers worldwide, because who doesn't need that many options to w...
Serval's $47M AI Agents for IT: Because Humans Were Too Busy Making Coffee
Serval's $47M funding brings AI agents to IT service management, promising 24/7 automation with a side of hilarious mishaps and passive-aggressive quips. Read how these 'agentic' bots are reshaping tech support.
Wiz CTO Ami Luttwak Reveals AI Cyberattacks Are Now Smarter Than Your Average Human – And They’re Stealing Your Cat Photos
Wiz CTO Ami Luttwak's satirical take on AI cyberattacks: hackers now use AI to steal data and crack jokes. Learn why startups must prioritize security in this hilarious tech exposé.
Neon App Pays You to Spill Your Guts: AI Firms Are Eavesdropping for Pennies
Discover how Neon app pays users to record calls and sell data to AI firms in this hilarious satirical take on modern tech trends and privacy ironies.
AI-Generated Bug Reports: The Digital Equivalent of Finding a Used Tissue in Your Happy Meal
AI-generated security reports are flooding bug bounty programs with nonsense, leaving researchers to wonder if the AI even knows what a computer is.
NordLocker: Because Who Doesn't Want to Encrypt Their Cat Photos?
In a world where even your toaster might be plotting against you, NordLocker steps up to encrypt your files with military-grade algorithms. Now, you can securely store your grocery lists and vacati...