Softbank
Selected reporting and mythical analysis on softbank.
The Zillion-Dollar 'AI-itecture' Deals That Might Just Be Fancy Computer Room Renovations
Discover the hilarious truth behind billion-dollar AI infrastructure deals as tech giants compete to build the fanciest computer rooms. From Meta's AI theme park to Oracle's 'AI-enabled' stickers, we expose the absurd reality of the AI boom's secret sauce.
Indian 'Vibe-Coding' Startup Emergent's Valuation Skyrockets to $300M: Investors Finally Realize No One Knows What They Actually Do
Indian startup Emergent's valuation hits $300M with 'vibe-coding' magic. Investors pour $70M into ambiguous software, ARR targets $100M by 2026. Satire on tech buzzwords and VC trends.
Meesho's IPO Soars 46% as Investors Discover They Can Now Lose Money Faster in E-commerce
Meesho's IPO skyrockets 46% as investors embrace the thrilling uncertainty of bargain e-commerce. Satirical look at startup mania where enthusiasm outweighs economics.
SoftBank's Meesho IPO: When $606 Million Meets the 'First Major E-commerce Listing' That's Just So, So Major
SoftBank bets big on Meesho's $606M IPO, India's 'first major' e-commerce listing that's redefining 'major' with a side of sarcasm and samosa math.
Skylum's Luminar & X-Membership: Because Your Selfies Deserve a Red Carpet Entrance
In an era where your camera roll looks like a tragic comedy, Skylum’s Luminar teams up with the exclusive X-Membership to transform your humble snapshots into blockbuster-worthy works of art—becaus...
SoftBank's Nvidia Stock Sale: The Great AI Panic of Our Time, or Just Masayoshi Son's Wild Ride?
SoftBank's sale of Nvidia stock sparks market chaos and wild theories—is Masayoshi Son a genius or just stirring up AI drama? Read our hilarious take on the tech turmoil.
Intel's Foundry Fiasco: Billions in the Bank, but Still Can't Figure Out How to Make Chips
Intel's $20 billion Q3 boost can't hide their foundry failures in this hilarious take on tech woes. Read why billions in the bank aren't buying silicon success.
AI's Billion-Dollar Infrastructure Bonanza: When Tech Titans Turn Real Estate Into Silicon Sandcastles
Dive into the hilarious world of AI infrastructure deals where tech giants build data centers with more irony than intelligence. A satirical take on the billion-dollar madness powering the AI boom.
SoftBank's New Robot Army: Because Humans Are Too Slow and Emotional for World Domination
SoftBank's hilarious acquisition of ABB's robotics unit promises a future filled with emotional robots and industrial mayhem. Dive into this satirical take on tech's latest obsession.
NordVPN's Threat Protection Pro™: Because Who Needs a Dedicated Antivirus Anymore?
In a bold move to simplify your cybersecurity shopping list, NordVPN introduces Threat Protection Pro™—a feature that not only encrypts your data but also scans your downloads for malware, blocks m...
AI Infrastructure Bonanza: How Tech Giants Are Spending Billions to Build the World's Most Expensive Tinfoil Hats
Dive into the absurd world of AI infrastructure deals, where tech giants spend billions on data centers that might just be the world's most expensive tinfoil hats. Satire at its finest!
AI Infrastructure Deals: When Billion-Dollar Spending Sprees Go Hilariously Awry
Discover the hilarious side of AI infrastructure deals as tech giants burn billions in a satirical take on Meta, Oracle, Microsoft, Google, and OpenAI's spending sprees.
OpenAI's Stargate: The Galactic Domination Tour Now Accepting Applications from Earthlings
In a move that shocked absolutely no one, OpenAI's Stargate project, the $500 billion brainchild of tech's most ambitious (or delusional) minds, is now eyeing internationa...
OpenAI's $40B Party: SoftBank Leads the Charge While We Stick to Making AI Memes
In a world where the rest of us are still trying to figure out how to make ChatGPT generate a decent joke, OpenAI is out there playing Monopoly with real money. Yes, the AI overlords are at...
NordVPN: Because Who Doesn't Love Adding Extra Layers to Their Already Complicated Digital Lives?
In a world where your refrigerator might be spying on you, NordVPN heroically steps in to encrypt your every move. With over 7,000 servers worldwide, because who doesn't need that many options to w...
SoftBank Buys Sharp's Old LCD Factory to Build the Ultimate AI Toaster
In a move that has left the tech world scratching its head and asking, 'But why though?', SoftBank has announced the purchase of an old Sharp LCD factory for a cool $676 million. The plan? To turn ...