Unicorns
Selected reporting and mythical analysis on unicorns.
2026's European 'Unicorn' Startups: Where Dreams Are Vaporware and Valuation Is Pure Magic
Discover Europe's 2026 unicorn startups: where buttering robots, cloud aesthetics, and pasta blockchain redefine billion-dollar dreams in this satirical tech expose.
Harmattan AI's $200M Series B: Because Nothing Says 'Innovation' Like Letting Fighter Jets Fund Your AI
Harmattan AI raises $200M from Dassault Aviation, becoming a defense unicorn in a satirical tale of AI, fighter jets, and absurd tech funding. Read our hilarious take on this tech news.
Brevo Becomes Unicorn: Now Offers CRM That Actually Cares About Your Customers (Unlike Those Other Guys)
Brevo's $583M funding proves treating customers like humans might just be the next big thing in CRM. Silicon Valley is shaking in its hoodies.
FlatPay's Flat Fee Frenzy: How One Startup's Boring Bet Made Them a Unicorn by Charging Less for More Nothing
Discover how FlatPay's flat fee fintech model turned a boring idea into a billion-dollar unicorn, challenging giants with predictability and a dash of absurd humor.
NordPass Business: Because Remembering Passwords Is So 1999
In an era where your smart fridge can order milk but can't remember its own password, NordPass Business swoops in to save the day. Offering seamless password security for your company, it ensures t...