How 2 UC Berkeley Dropouts Convinced Investors to Give Them $28 Million to Teach AI to Send Spam Emails

In a world where innovation is measured by how many unnecessary problems you can solve with blockchain, two UC Berkeley dropouts have managed to secure a cool $28 million for their groundbreaking AI marketing automation startup, Conversation. Yes, you heard that right. They’ve essentially built a robot that can annoy you with emails faster than a human ever could.

The founding story of Conversation is so cliché, it could have been ripped straight from an episode of Silicon Valley. Picture this: two brilliant minds, sitting in their dorm room, surrounded by empty Red Bull cans and a half-eaten pizza, when suddenly, inspiration strikes. "What if we could automate the process of sending emails that no one reads?" And just like that, a unicorn was born.

Investors, always on the lookout for the next big thing that doesn’t actually need to exist, threw money at them faster than you can say "series A funding." "We believe in their vision," said one investor, who we’re pretty sure was just trying to sound smart in front of his peers. "The future is automated spam," he added, without a hint of irony.

So, what does Conversation actually do? Well, it uses AI to send out marketing emails that are "personalized" based on your browsing history. Because nothing says "I care about you" like an email that starts with "We noticed you looked at socks on our website 3 months ago." Truly, revolutionary stuff.

But don’t just take our word for it. According to the founders, their AI is "learning" every day. "It’s getting better at understanding human emotions," they claim, as it sends out its 10,000th email about a "limited time offer" that’s been running for 6 months. We can’t wait to see what it comes up with next. Maybe it’ll figure out how to auto-reply to your "unsubscribe" requests with another marketing email. The possibilities are endless.