Chips
Selected reporting and mythical analysis on chips.
Nvidia's Record Quarter: CEO Jensen Huang Admits They've Run Out of Numbers to Count Money With
Nvidia's latest earnings report reveals record profits amid absurd capex spending, while gamers trade kidneys for GPUs and Jensen Huang's jacket becomes sentient. Satire at its most profitable.
MatX Raises $500M to Build AI Chip That Makes Your Coffee and Forgets Your Name
AI chip startup MatX raises $500M to challenge Nvidia with promises, PowerPoint presentations, and chips that might eventually work. Silicon Valley satire at its finest.
The US Semiconductor Circus 2025: From Chip Shortages to CEO Meltdowns in One Chaotic Year
A hilarious and exaggerated look at the chaotic US semiconductor market in 2025, featuring CEO meltdowns, absurd policies, and chipfluencer drama.
Nvidia's $2B Bet on Synopsys: Because What's a Little More Monopoly Between Friends?
Nvidia's $2B investment in Synopsys isn't just a deal—it's a satirical masterpiece of tech monopoly, AI bubbles, and corporate jargon. Dive into the humor and irony of chip-design dominance.
Skylum's Luminar & X-Membership: Because Your Selfies Deserve a Red Carpet Entrance
In an era where your camera roll looks like a tragic comedy, Skylum’s Luminar teams up with the exclusive X-Membership to transform your humble snapshots into blockbuster-worthy works of art—becaus...
Nvidia's H20 Chips Stuck in Bureaucratic Quicksand: Commerce Department's Paperwork Avalanche Hits New Heights
Nvidia's cutting-edge H20 chips are trapped in the Commerce Department's legendary backlog, proving that even technology can't escape the clutches of bureaucracy. Will they ever see the light of day?
Ambiq's IPO So High It Needs a Oxygen Mask: Chipmaker's Stock Climbs Like It's on Silicon Steroids
Ambiq's IPO debut sees shares climbing 61%, leaving Wall Street in awe and investors wondering if they should start investing in alphabet-based strategies.
The Great Semiconductor Circus of 2025: A Tale of Chips, Chaos, and Congress
Dive into the hilarious chaos of the 2025 US semiconductor market, where leadership changes, policy flip-flops, and chip shortages create a comedy of errors that's too absurd to believe.
2025: The Year Semiconductors Took Over the World (And Your Toaster)
Dive into the absurdity of 2025, where semiconductors rule the world, toasters gain sentience, and the AI race turns into a passive-aggressive showdown.
NordVPN's Threat Protection Pro™: Because Who Needs a Dedicated Antivirus Anymore?
In a bold move to simplify your cybersecurity shopping list, NordVPN introduces Threat Protection Pro™—a feature that not only encrypts your data but also scans your downloads for malware, blocks m...
Cognichip Demands AI to Build Chips Because Humans Are Apparently Too Slow Now
Cognichip's latest plan to use AI for designing AI chips is either a stroke of genius or a sign of the impending robot takeover. You decide.
2025: The Year U.S. Semiconductors Decided to Throw a Drama-Filled Party
Dive into the hilariously chaotic world of the 2025 U.S. semiconductor market, where drama, shortages, and AI ambitions collide in the most absurd ways imaginable.
Amazon CEO Andy Jassy Declares AI Investment or Die Trying - A Satirical Survival Guide
In a shocking turn of events that absolutely no one saw coming, Amazon CEO Andy Jassy has boldly declared that companies must invest "aggressively" in AI or risk becoming as releva...